GOOD THOUGHTS :: What are you thinking about?

 What you are you telling yourself today? 

What you are you telling yourself today? 


What Are You Thinking About? 

Our inner world is where we most spend our time.  I mean, think about it, when are you NOT with yourself?  I find it ironic that we all spend so much time protecting ourselves from being hurt by others when we often are the ones injuring ourselves the most.

Our self talk (that voice in our head -- you know the one) can be so rough and down right rude, it's no wonder some days after hanging with our inner critic we feel like something just scraped off the bottom of our shoe!  This morning I caught Meaghan Ramsey's TED Talk: Why thinking you're ugly is bad for you. It’s about how our cultural focus on the physical attributes of the individual is negatively affecting our children, and how we are raising adults that think it's okay to verbally beat themselves up each day.

We teach our kids lots of good things, but we might be missing the bus when it comes to the subject of self worth, confidence, and body image.

Get on the GOOD THOUGHT bus to self love, baby...all the cool kids are doing it. Tweet the Love

Our emotional connection and self worth affects how we function everyday in the world, whether we apply for job, raise our hand in class or speak up in a meeting.  Just because no one else can hear those thoughts we have about ourselves doesn't mean they are harmless, actually quite the opposite. It is like we are in an abusive relationship with our self, all day long. It would be obvious how hurtful our thoughts were if someone else was saying them, but somehow we put up with, and even nurture that nasty inner critic. 

Just like breaking a bad habit, or breaking free of an abusive relationship, it takes time and commitment to break free of that vicious cycle of painful thinking. One powerful tool to create inner transformation is a process known as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). CBT isn’t about rehashing the past. In CBT what actually happens to us in life that causes negative emotions isn’t the focus, but how our thoughts about these events continues to affect us. In CBT you learn to challenge the status quo of what you think, telling that inner critic, “thanks, but no thanks.” Without all that negative talk you start to reap the benefits of feeling good.  Basically what you think frames how you feel (umm, awesome sauce). And, it is a positive feedback loop a new healthy habit!

Good Thoughts = Good Feelings.
Good Feelings = Good Thoughts.  

Good thoughts create a positive feedback loop. Change your brain and rock your world. Tweet the love

The way I describe this to my clients is to think of a friend you are very comfortable with.  You laugh, snort, and share all what is going on in your life with them (the good, the bad, and everything in-between) without hesitation or concerns of perfection. Now think about another friend, or perhaps a colleague or acquaintance, someone who makes you feel low, drained or exhausted, even after just a lunch -- like the life has been sucked out of you, whenever you are in their presence.

Our thoughts are energy and have power!  Just like when we are around someone who is down, or negative, we feel it and it spreads, our attitude toward ourselves is force that spreads like a virus to infect other people as well. Being around positive people lifts us up. Thinking good thoughts lifts us up. The better we feel and the more truly, deeply good and positive we are, the more we bring that to those around us. And, when we feel good, what we previously thought was impossible becomes easy.

Good thoughts create ease, peace and freedom. Tweet the love

How are your thoughts and self dialogue affecting YOU!?  Are you feeling good right now?  Are you feeling uplifted?  Do you feel content?  If so, great! You are giving voice to your inner friend. Keep inviting that voice to sing and play. If not, what can you let go of? Tell that inner critic, “thanks, but no thanks, I got this,” and then say or do something great for yourself. It might feel foreign at first, but you’ll get the hang of it. For the next week look for simple things you can love about your self. See how you feel when you speak of yourself in loving, supportive, hopeful, joyous and beautiful ways.

Start a cultural revolution. Share good thoughts of love and kindness with yourself today. You will not only feel good but so will everyone around you! Tweet the love